Bad Asylum

Online since 1808

Month: February 2019 Page 1 of 2

I, Plagiarism: Quoth the Raven #5

I got pissed this morning and wrote up a serious blog post. But writing it made me unpissed, took the wind out of my knickers, so I’m not wasting time typing that up. (At least not today. I’ll wait until it’s a non-issue that the world has moved on from, and then I’ll toss it out there for everyone to see.)

Just know this, I hate YouTube Kids and the internet is poison and nobody should use it. Except for my blog. All of you should read my blog.

With that, let us away on another glorious installment of Quoth the Raven.

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How Juggling Can Make You a Better Writer

Scene: You’re at a circus/carnival, surrounded by circus/carnival sights and sounds. The laughter of children, the rattle of the roller coaster, the ding ding ding of someone stronger than you winning that hammer game, disorienting flashing lights, crowds, and… what’s that? A red nose? Rudolph? No, worse, it’s a clown.

For once, stock art does not disappoint. I’m terrified.

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No Rest for the Wicked: BAMusic #4

Gods, I need some rest but I’m not gonna get any. Why? Because I won’t let myself.

My solemn vow to the none of you reading last week; This week we’d do Cage the Elephant. And I’ll be damned to the lowest levels of hell if I fail you.

So here it is.

*something clever*

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Top Ten Greatest Writers in the History of Forever

Otherwise known as Edmund J. Asher’s top ten favorite authors (an unequivocal opinion). Yes, this is a D20 list. The die has already been cast, because you showed up late, and the die has decided to go traditional. A top ten list.

So here they are, the ten best writers, in no particular order. You can’t ask me to do that.

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Out of the Closet, Into the Woods: Gaming With Children #3

Part One

Part Two

Alright, enough procrastinating. When we last left our decidedly-not-heroes, they were cowering in a closet after the cries of a woman echoed through their small and once peaceful village.

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Sharknado Poison: Quoth the Raven #4

It’s two o’clock and I’m just now starting this blog post. I almost bowed out. Get back on the horse tomorrow. But I know myself better than that. Miss one day, and I’m done. That horse will be dead.

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Soulless Eyes

[This isn’t even remotely close to what I sat down to write this morning. I’m not asking you to accept the conclusion, because I don’t. It’s just what flowed today. I want to give it a trigger warning, but I feel like I shouldn’t. That’s your warning. I’m going to consider this draft the final product and never look at it again.]

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The Sexophonist: BAMusic #3

It’s Tuesday again! (They say it’s a new Tuesday, but it feels the same. Like a week long groundhog day, made longer by the fact that my wife won’t let us watch Russian Doll until it has concluded… in it’s entirety.)

But Tuesday. And it’s on the tail end of Valentine’s day, so I figured our song this week would have to be Wham! (I said so last week, and I’m a man of my word. Because I said I am.)

If Deadpool introduced you to George Michael then a simultaneous shame and kudos to you.

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Children in the midst of nightmare are an unnerving sight. You try to speak to them through their anguished wails, assure them with a touch, only to be pushed away by their flailing limbs. Even when they finally wake, they’re so dazed you can’t be sure they’re conscious. Can’t be sure they know where they are, or who you are. Their fear persists, eventually dying down to a whimper, which eventually subsides to sleep.

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Tired of Human-ing, See You Monday

I had a bad headache yesterday, leaving my head feeling like a bowl of soup today. So this is just to let you know, no blog post today.

Oh, shit.

This is a blog post. Alright. Since I’m here…


What is going on in the world of Edmund J. Asher?

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