I’ve been having two weeks from hell. Withdrawals are a pain in the ass.

No. Not hard drugs. Just caffeine. Still sucks.

Am I even a writer if I don’t drink caffeine? Like, I barely ever drank coffee to start with. Just sodee-pop. Way too much sodee-pop.

On top of that, everyone in the house has been sick. So I’m not sure what has been the sickness and what has been withdrawal.

Excuses? Absolutely. I don’t give a shit. My head hurts.

Maybe the excuses are good enough this time but they are still excuses. And excuses crop up no matter what goes on. We’ve all got shit to do. Bills, work, cleaning, eating, breathing, burying bodies (How do we even get the time to off a person these days?), sleeping (hahahaha).

Mixing kids in just means you have more shit to do and you have to do it while you’re juggling… on fire.

You more streamlined and/or pragmatic types may be yelling, “Don’t bury the bodies! You’ve got perfectly good fire going right there.”

To which I respond, “It takes a big fire to get rid of a body. Plus the neighbor’s infinite supply of dogs will come picking through it like they do with my fucking garbage. They carry off a skull and then everyone is asking questions.”

I’m just so pressed for time, my disposal methods aren’t really up to standards.

Nothing is. Something’s got to give.

No, goodie-goodies, I will not stop my murder studies. I’ve got to be able to write authentically on the subject. Plus how else am I going to make duct-tape, shovels, and rope tax deductible.

Shit. Almost lost all those words because I wasn’t paying attention to battery life. That would have hurt my productivity even more… So, yeah.


That’s what we’re talking about today.

How can we get done all the shit that needs done while still making meaningful progress on our work? (Writing. Anyone whose work is anything else. Hit the road… No, no. You can stay. Just pretend I’m talking about something else when I say word count. Like bunnies.)

Well… let’s talk about word count (…bunnies) and how little of it is required to actually translate over to productivity.

Say you do a thousand words a day. Doesn’t seem like much, right? At the end of the year you’ve got a word count (bunny count) of 365,000 (Sometimes 366,000!). You’ve got three to six novels right there depending on your genre.

That’s assuming a quality word count (bunn… No, you know what? You can sub bunnies yourself.). Words you can keep. At a thousand? Not so bad. Not so unreasonable to pull regular two to three thousand days if you can carve out the time. Manage that every day and you are looking at 730,000 to 1,095,000 words a year. What are you even gonna do with all those bunnies?

For the record, my best day (by a longshot) has been 6,500 words. Fairly polished too. I’d say its more in line with the work of 13,000 words considering I wrote it on paper and then typed it up in the same day. Another productivity killer. I’m working on it. Trying to save the paper for notes and those scenes I can’t quite get my head around.

Crazy word counts like that don’t mean anything if they only happen once a year. The point is keeping up your average and my average is pretty fucking abysmal. It’s improving but it still has some way to go.

Sure, I’ve written a novel this year. But it still has a ways to go. Editing and what not. First full, in-depth edit should be done by the end of this month.

Thinking about it, maybe I’m not doing so bad. But I have no idea because I don’t really track my bunnies that close. I think I’m going to start. Maybe even make myself more accountable by tweeting that shit on the daily. Annoy people with my word counts (novel and blog word counts separate. Not going to delude myself on my novel progress.).

What Else?

Just some things I’ve been working on to improve productivity. Cut out the garbage that you can do without. I pretty much only watch movies with my wife and kids at this point. We don’t have cable tv, so no problem.

Internet. There’s a lot to do online. Most of it is fucking worthless. We have a fairly limited internet connection or I suppose this might be a bigger issue for me. We have such strained access that I’ve been dreading making a blog post. Point? Limit your use.

Hobbies? I count reading as part of my work but if I’m not careful I can get carried away. Video games? I’ve got about ten that I’ve not even started. Waste of money but not a waste of time. In the past half a year I’ve only really sat down to play video games with my kids or once or twice with friends.

Murders? I’ve gotten pretty skilled at it. I’m sure it wouldn’t hurt to cut back. Maybe just reward myself every once in a while. When I accomplish something meaningful.

Everything that demands your attention. Get it done. And then? Do your best to maintain your progress. No one is gonna fault you if life gets in the way. That’s what life does. Just don’t make excuses. When you do? Recognize it.

Figure out your priorities and go from there.

Alright. Post done. I’m gonna go reward myself.